What's your strategy to make your marriage great?

Alot of people expect their marriages/ relationships to ''just work'' but the truth of the matter is that sometimes they ''just dont''!, you need to invest in them; your time, money and resources.

The love seems to fizzle away over time and you find yourself longing for things to go back to when it all started, "The rosy days". Have you at some point asked these questions; ''What is happening to us'', ''I do not understand him/her'' you are wondering what has gone wrong. 

Life is dynamic and so is your marriage, it is also in constant change and you have to understand the mechanics of marriage to make it work.

A great marriage is when you click, you want to spend time together, you understand each other, you last fought 6 months ago ( yes!), you want to be seen with him/her, they make you proud, things are flowing and moving, you are happy! Is your marriage great yet? where are you now? 

Alot of factors contribute to changes in marriage; birth of children, loss of a job, reduced income, increased income, family setup changes (taking in relatives, in-laws), sickness, death of children,changes in age(aging,midlife crisis),there are numerous. It is important to adapt to changes in your marriage. How?
Marriage and Parenting Seminar Key Highlights with Dr. SM Chirisa
1. Your Attitude towards your spouse and marriage, you used to be caring and loving,you feel this distance between you and your spouse, conversations have changed, how and why did you develop the coldness?

2.Your Actions have changed (Before you would hug when you met but now its just a '''hie'' or ''Ndeipi'' type of greeting , you do not want to be seen or be associated with your spouse ...
3.Your conversations with your spouse have become short and generic, lack of intimacy, you stopped calling each other ? why?

In order to succeed in marriage, you have to understand that your marriage is not simply going to work because you are married; just because you have a strong desire for things to work is not enough. Marriage will work when you

1.Have a strategy to make your marriage great- a game plan to make things work.
2. Get the correct information about marriage, prepare for marriage. Moat people do more preparations for the lobola ceremony and the wedding rather than the marriage itself.What model are you using for your marriage? it is not a flawed one? What information on marriage are you exposed to?
3.Have an accountability partner (marriage mentor), every couple must have one, someone you respect and is able to keep you both inline. A marriage mentor who can offer good counsel. Who are you modeling your marriage after?
4. Have absolute agreed statements- , agree that even when things are bad no-one will cheat, no-one will look for a ''painkiller'', Even when you argue or disagree, ''my hand will not touch you'' what are your absolute statements in your marriage?

What are the boundaries you will both not cross?


Look out for part 2 of the marriage seminar post to follow!

Contact Us On: info@drsmchirisa.com to find out more about our marriage sessions, seminars and programmes.